The bridegroom and the bride.

Genesis 1:26 Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals,[a] and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” 27 So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God, he created them; male and female, he created them.

For those in Christ, this month is significant. It is the month we celebrate the most extraordinary love story of all time. It is the story of a bridegroom who gave everything, even his priesthood, for his bride. This story may not excite many, but for those who have accepted the engagement, our hearts are glad, and we wait with great expectation for our bridegroom.  

Most people get married with the wrong idea in mind. The attraction to the opposite sex comes with the benefit of pleasure. Understanding marriage God’s way opens our eyes to the power of two. There is no doubt that intimacy is part of the marriage covenant. The unspoken purpose of marriage is to express the image of God. Preparation and knowing one’s role and responsibility set the couple up for success.

The male and the female represent different expressions of God. In Genesis 1:1-3, God said Let us create. God the Father, Son, and Spirit agreed to carry out this vision. God formed man from the dust of the earth and breathed life into his body. The science behind the creation of woman is that God took his rib, aka bone, from which the life of man is what we call blood. Scriptures tell us life is in the blood. Within Adam were the two expressions of God. God took the blood of Adam and formed a woman. 

When God performed surgery on Adam, He divided his image into male and female. He gave each individual their unique purpose, responsibility, and an expression of Himself. Man was created for fellowship. It is the deepest form of intimacy. Sex is a form of worship unto God. When God is the center of a marriage, it is a godly followship. Marriage is a picture of perfection. It is a merging of visions and anointing with one common goal: to reveal God. The glory of God is seen through intimacy.

VS 28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”

In God’s original plan, the earth was to serve man and not man toiling hard to get a harvest. God prepared everything for man before He placed Adam and Eve in the garden. He instructed them to have dominion over the earth. There was no contention; everything worked in harmony, and the peace of God governed the world and its inhabitants. The presence of God was with man. God came down and fellowshipped with the everyday. The perfect order of God was corrupted when Adam sinned. You see, disobedience to God demotes man. The penalty for that was hardship.

The image of God can only be expressed through holiness. Where there is disobedience, strife, and selfish ambitions, pride is enthroned. Immediately after man sinned, that perfection was now corrupted. Blame and false judgment were displayed. Adam blamed Eve, and she, in turn, blamed the serpent. Division resulted from their disobedience. When the spirit of God leads, there is unity. When Adam and Eve sinned, separation occurred.  

The perfect order for marriage is oneness. Jesus emphasized this several times in his ministry. I do as I see my Father do, and I say what my Father says. He illustrated the unity between him and God. Jesus was introduced as the bridegroom in Ephesians 5:21-33. This chapter is primarily used to counsel couples. It was widely used to silence women and empower men to walk in deception. The core of this chapter is to reveal Christ's relationship with the church.

21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

The very first key to unlock success in marriage is submission to each other in love. Many bypass this verse and go straight to the next verse as an offensive weapon to subdue women. However, God made it clear that the fear of God aligns everything. A man who submits to God leads his family well. He honors God and receives honor without reproach. 

Marriage is a ministry. It is also warfare. Just like Halel desired God's throne, he desires to replace peace with chaos. When God takes first place in our lives, there is no room for the enemy to slither in.  God honors covenants. Anything a couple agrees on has God’s seal of approval. When the head lives in righteousness, oil flows from the head down. The wife carries out her role with ease. Their children thrive. 

As it is in the spirit, so it is in the natural. God's Kingdom is governed by holiness. Jesus lived holily. As the bridegroom, he sanctified his bride. A husband’s number one role is to honor God. By doing so, he sanctifies his bride with God's word. Pleasure is a great bonus when his house is in order. He provides safety for his bride. He intercedes on behalf of his bride. He covers and leads with his bride with premium care. When the covenant is not violated, blessings are abundant. 

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

A wife who knows her God will be praised. What a divine promise. Covenant is essential to enjoying the benefits God has for marriage. In Genesis 1, when God spoke, the Spirit moved. In the same way, a man creates a safe space for his wife to flourish in her grace. He does not have to beg for submission; his wife does not have to force it. Submission is automatic when a wife is celebrated. 

A woman of virtue submits to her husband because she has first submitted to God. She has wisdom, strength, and diligence in everything she does. She is excellent in business and trustworthy because she operates under the authority and spirit of God. Godly stewardship comes from the spirit of God.  That kind of woman knows her worth and contribution to the family. She is broken emotionally, and her entire family feels it. 

Titus 2 tells us that a wise woman is trained. That is a key element to becoming a wife of substance. She is an intercessor. Her strength comes from the Lord. Her beauty stems from within. She is a woman of wealth. She knows her authority and carries it with grace. A woman trained by godly principles is not intimidated by external pressures; she is graced with weapons that subdue the enemies coming against her family.

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

Submission is not just for wives. Husbands are called to a higher level of submission. Recently, the church has been talking more about the office of a husband. When men take their rightful place, we will begin to see fewer divorces in the body of Christ. How a man leads his family is a clear indication of his intimacy with God. A man without a prayer life lacks the skills to lead his wife and children. 1 Timothy 3:5 states that if a man does not know how to lead his family, he is not qualified to serve in a leadership position in the church. 

God holds the role of husband in high esteem. It is like the care, love, and sacrifice that Jesus made for his bride, the church. Assuming the role of a husband is an office. We have seen marriage end in divorce because the primary purpose of marriage was never taught in homes or even in church. Marriage also qualifies men for leadership; even though one has the call of God on their life, they must be tested by the word to be chosen to lead God’s people. A compromised husband at home will misrepresent the Lord in the church. 

Satan hates marriage because it attracts the glory of God. Satan has done a great job of turning the purity of marriage into a detestable, dirty, and sinful act. Marriage is meant for sanctification. It is a holy act. God’s design for marriage is to attract his glory. Marriage is a promotion that comes with more responsibilities. Marriage comes with warfare. When a man leans on Christ to lead his home, he can’t fail. When the head of the house is in submission to the Lord, he leads with love. His heart is connected to the Lord; the anointing flows from Christ to the husband, down to the wife, and so forth. 

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Who would have thought that the Lord used marriage to reveal his vision for the church? Marriage is an expression of God's love towards us. The reason he came, died, and resurrected was to redeem us. Without sanctification, no one can see God.  In essence, marriage points us to our loving Father. When we understand what Jesus did for us, we will be more willing to sacrifice for one another.  

Marriage serves as a buffer, exposing areas of our lives that do not meet God’s standard of holiness. When conflicts arise, it is not an opportunity for God to reveal his glory in and through us. As both husband and wife submit to God, they are more sensitive to the Holy Spirit. It is easy to repent and turn away from what the conflict was meant to destroy.  

A healthy marriage produces God-fearing children. When men and women are trained in righteousness, they are equipped for the roles and responsibilities of marriage; their homes function better; and children are raised to serve God in their communities. Can you see why satan attacks marriages? The effect is seen in broken homes and nations filled with bitterness and hatred. Anything outside of Christ lacks an element that only the creator can provide. The more intimate we are with God, the closer we get to each other. 

29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

According to verse 29, a man who abuses his authority does not love himself and does not know God. Any man who has the fear of God treats his wife as the weaker vessel and cherishes her. He understands that a wife is a blessing. If she is treated well, God listens to his prayers. Women are meant to be loved like the Holy Spirit is. A well-kept woman is a representation of her husband. Husband creates a safe place for his wife to function in her office as a wife. 

When a wife is cared for, it shows. Not only does she glow, and everything she touches flourishes, but her children also call her blessed. She can teach them not just with words, but her actions speak for themselves. Much like a well-nourished ministry functions at its full capacity when everyone is acknowledged and uses their gifts and abilities. 

The health of a ministry depends on the health of its leadership. The spirit of the Lord descends when order is established in the home and in the church.  God gave a protocol for marriage and also the criteria for leadership in his church. A man may be given authority to lead his family and ministry, but he answers to God. Failing to handle these responsibilities with care is detrimental to him. 

30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

From Genesis to Revelation, God made it clear what is good and acceptable. Marriage is satisfying for both the husband and the wife. Their love for each other is evident in acts of kindness and in their desire for intimacy. They are also responsible for revealing God to others. The way they serve each other is unto the Lord. It is an outside expression of our relationship with God. 

Ministry starts at home. Good leadership is nurtured at home and demonstrated by the manifestation of God's light, presence, and counsel in our various ministries. We pass on the things we have within us at home, in church, and to our communities. How we treat our families and the people God has given us stewardship over indicates who we worship with our thoughts, words, and actions.  

As children of God, may we not take our walk with God for granted. Everything we do reveals God at work or gives license to another spirit to bear fruit in our lives. Submission is not forced; it is a willing act of giving God glory. Purity, holiness, and righteousness are not an act; they are a posture. May we all water the garden of our hearts so Christ can be revealed in our acts of service to our spouses as unto Him.